We Chose You

We Chose You

Knowing our son’s fatal diagnosis destroyed us. But we somehow had to reassemble ourselves from the ruin and face the decision that was before us: terminate the pregnancy or carry to term. Having a choice in all of this haunted our souls, thrusting us deeper into the...
Paralyzed

Paralyzed

We did not receive news that our baby did die. That alone would be enough to destroy us. No, we were informed that he will die. Death is tearing our son away from us slowly and surely. But the amputation of our family didn’t seem to be enough to satisfy our oppressor....
The Dream That Haunts Me

The Dream That Haunts Me

I had a dream for our future family. But this dream has been viciously mangled into a horrific nightmare. Last year, Jillian and I began talking more seriously about trying to start a family. Understandably anxious about pregnancy and delivery, my very practical wife...
An Awful Agony

An Awful Agony

It’s hard to string words together that accurately describe the agony I’ve become so familiar with. It’s a pain that’s expressed through the horrible harmony of moans and tears, punctuated by gasps for air while you weep. Your stomach collapses...
Destroyed

Destroyed

We were guarded. On watch. But no amount of caution could prevent us from being destroyed. We know enough stories of infertility, miscarriage, and infant loss to justify a defensive stance through pregnancy, especially our first one. Our doctor’s first attempt...